Jena Avogat as in, "Avogat to take my pill" as many of
her classmates would call to her across the quad, in the caf, in the hall,
everyone in her school knew she was "preggers" as she put it before
she was even showing. She was amazed, she explained while preparing to
demonstrate the newest "labor induction maneuver" she had heard of,
that her parents did not know before she told them. Growing up in Little
Armenia CA left little room for secrets. Everyone knew everyone else's secrets
either by blood, marriage or religion. Her parents had such high hopes for her.
She figured she had pretty much blown her full ride to Stanford. As a Junior at
Hollywood High School, yes, that Hollywood, and because she was just brilliant,
and she was, she was on the fast track to a Media Studies degree before there
was such a thing. Jena would not divulge her FOB. She didn't want to harm his
career; he was just graduated and was already picking up small movie parts here
and there. His parents were very upset that he did not go directly to
university, but he figured there was plenty of time for that when he was old
and ugly. I'm not sure if those were his words or hers. Jena just wanted this
"thing" out of her. Hand it over, sign off on it and move on. Every
so often, I read the credits of movies to see if I can find her name. I just
know she went on to pursue her dream of producing and directing.
So, Jena was preparing to demonstrate the labor induction exercise
so we could all try it. We were in the room that she shared with Angel and she
was. I have never known anyone since who so perfectly fit her name. How did her
parents know? She was the human equivalent of the angel in DaVinci's
"Virgin on the Rocks" painting. Literally, her hair just naturally
made these tiny curls around her face, which looked as if it had been etched
out of milky Quartz. She was very quiet. I rarely heard her speak and when
people say that pregnant women are beautiful, to this day, her image comes to
my mind. I never asked about her FOB. I just wanted to believe that she was
filled with the Divine. She really wasn't real to me. Unlike Avogat, as we
called her, who was the most mischievous elf-like figure I have ever seen. She
was a very round version of Moaning Myrtle (Shirley Henderson). She had packed
on the pounds once she told her folks. The whole thing had to be run through a
family meeting. She explained and then a meeting with the Priest who felt Jena
would be forgiven for her poor behavior but he did not want her walking around
the neighborhood like anyone approved of it either. So, Jena had arrived at St.
Anne's just two weeks before I had.
Back to the labor induction. Avogat's labor was over due. The deal
she made with the kid, she told us, was that she would do everything in her
power to provide "it" with a good healthy start in life. Her five
foot nothing height and the way she wore her pregnancy was visual confirmation
of that promise. She looked like a geodome, one of those round houses that run
on solar and use green energy and encircle those who live inside. Her due date
was a long week gone by and she figured her end of the deal was complete, so
now "it" had to vacate the premises. Jena had slid the two twin beds
that every room held, together to provide a wide flat space. She had pushed
them up against one wall to provide a backstop and was poised up against the
opposite wall. She was standing on her toes and leaning forward inasmuch as a
ball can lean forward before it rolls forward.
Both hands were bent behind her as both counterbalance and once she extended
her fingers as a spring to push herself off of the wall. There was about 6 feet
between Jena and the bed and she aimed to build as much momentum as possible in
the space afforded her. There were five of us in the room: Jena, poised on the
wall; Angel, who was peeking around the doorway of the adjoining bathroom, two
girls whose names I have forgotten (apologies), and me. We were watching this
action closer than Olympic judges. Jena seemed to bob forward just a bit and
then she launched herself off of the wall and in about 15 tiny steps she
increased her momentum, somehow got her feet about a quarter of an inch off the
floor and did a pounding belly flop on the beds.
Those of us watching cringed in unison, "oohs and aahs "
were expressed and we stood frozen in position until Jena, squirming like a
turtle on a rock yelled, "Get me up"! We all moved to grab a limb and
after a fashion pulled her backwards off of the bed until her round little feet
could touch the floor and she pushed herself back up into a standing position.
For the next hour we reviewed technique, considered influencing variables, and watched
for signs of labor or maybe injury; then we all shuffled back to our own beds
to consider our own options for labor induction once the time came. This one
was not all that enticing. She said it did not hurt but it sure looked like it
hurt.
Jena's labor did not start in that hour or in that evening. She
waited almost another whole week before she tried her next theory. To my
knowledge there were no witnesses to this event. The last time anyone saw Jena
she was waiting for the pizza she had ordered to be delivered. More accurately,
she was waiting for the pizza delivery boy. Back in the day, as they say, pizza
delivery persons were almost always teenaged boys. We don't know if Jena
actually ate the pizza but we do know that she went into labor and delivered
her baby within 24 hours of the pizza delivery. What man starts another man
finishes. As we gathered to receive the news of Jena's delivery via the
"back track" we all weighed the options of this last technique.
Seduce the pizza boy. Some of the women who were repeat clients at St Anne's
swore by it. The rest of us weren't too sure. After all, that is what got us
here in the first place. No telling what kinds of complications a pizza boy
could bring to the party.
The "Back Track" was made up of veterans of the St.
Anne's experience, and there were several. They had been here before, and in a
couple cases before and even before that before. They knew the full layout of
the building, most of the nurses and all of the nuns. They never introduced themselves,
they just waited until us frightened newbies gathered in the community room to
discuss someone's absence, this usually meant they had been "taken
up" in the elevator to the hospital floor of the building to deliver, but
we did not know that for sure. "Going up" was both heaven and hell.
It meant the end of your stay at St. Anne's but the veterans told horror
stories about what happened "up" there. Usually, once a discussion
got started in the Community room a veteran sitting off in a corner of the room
would clear her throat and say, "well, the last time I was here..."
This always derailed the conversation as we all shifted to look at the speaker
and then migrate, in our little shuffle slippers, over to where she sat to
listen to the tale she had to tell.
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